Friday, July 29, 2011

The rude little rude rudies run the world


I am sick of cranking out long, researched, properly formatted editorial ideas and getting sent to File 13—forget her.

I am sick of “we value your call.” Yeah? I am from Missouri—show me. Hire people!

I must say I see racist invective in comment sections. Come on, there are many better reasons to hate someone, be original, think—you can find some!

Twitter—that seems rude—you are only worth a half-thought-out non-Haiku. Here is my half-vast idea. Now--YOU can retweet it and you don't even need your own half-vast idea.

And oh, the safety net—forget that, everyone is a scamming Welfare Queen, everyone deserves their bad luck, they must be losers, why one of them even got in an Express Line with 25 items. We killed her, though, so it’s OK.

The corporate jet flyers—none of them are businessmen trying to keep their company plants open—all are drinking their way to Monaco or the Hamptons.

You surf the net—skim over everything. We are not drowning in info—we never get into it enough to drown.

Someone said the Internet is God’s brain. Well, God, we are sorry. Don‘t make us hotter, though—unless it’s the good “hot.”

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