Thursday, September 15, 2011

The urge to purge


Remember the Mad Hatter’s Tea Party (call OSHA—mercury poisoning from cleaning beaver skins for hats)…Every so often, the Hatter would yell, “Clean cup!” and everyone would move down a place at the table—sitting, of course, in front of someone’s dirty cup.

[So this is what I am good at now—splaining fairy tales.]

Anyhow, I am trying to weed my garage. Stuff! People accumulate it—I have mine and Mom’s. And my kid’s—from when her room burned down 5 yrs ago.

This is bad feng shui—if I even believe in that anymore. Also it’s horrible-looking. Like house varicose veins or something.

I am putting out one box a week—nothing drastic. Checking it, getting the kid to take it to the trash.

This has been going on all summer and it looks the same.

I do advise going room by room. Start at 12 on the clock face of the room and move around quadrant by quadrant. Or do one box week.

If someone tries to put something in the garage, I throw a body block. I had to put back recent financial records, though—you know how all criminals like that stuff.

Criminals suck, don’t they? Always with the Nigerian scams, the Russian scams, the fake Fibbies saying you were scammed, the dumpster divers.

Wonder if they need to get rid of a lot of stuff. Oh, probably. Serves them right.

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